The Felixes
Or, the Anti-Oscars.TM

Best Picture 2003

The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

PRO: After three years, the trilogy's time has come

CON: Elvis fans feel neglected; despite two prepositional phrases, loses longest title title to "Master and Commander: the Far Side of the World"

Lost in Translation

PRO: Will do for struggling Japanese whisky industry what "E.T." did for Reese's Pieces

CON: Academy has never forgiven Murray for declining roles in "Caddyshack" and "Meatballs" sequels

Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World

PRO: This is like "Gladiator" with CGI sails instead of lions

CON: French bad guys' costumes and accents a little Disney-fied; title makes it sound like a Gary Larson retrospective

Mystic River

PRO: An acting fan's delight, with fantastic performances from Penn, Bacon, Robbins and Harden

CON: No young Julia Roberts throwing mozzarella on pies

Seabiscuit

PRO: Nothing distracts fan from an economic slowdown like this story of a scrappy little contender

CON: Except a good war in Iraq

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Felixes 2003 Table of Contents


Best Picture | Best Actor | Best Actress | Best Supporting Actor | Best Supporting Actress

Best Director | Best Foreign Film | Original Screenplay | Adapted Screenplay

Original Song | Original Dramatic Score |

Cinematography | Art Direction/Set Decoration | Editing | Documentary Feature

Results

Everything Else


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